PSA: Your mother does not want to see your drunken texts

There are many activities that people are discouraged from doing while under the influence of alcohol; driving a car, going to work and going to class are just a few examples. Serious consequences may follow as a result of these activities, including car accidents, being fired or flunking a class. But it would be prudent to add another item to the list of activities that are off-limits while intoxicated: texting. Web sites such as "Texts from Last Night" have won a nationwide fan base due to their hilarious content. This site publishes texts that people deem funny enough to send in and share with the world, hence the site's title. A vast majority of these texts are likely the result of drunken texting. These texts are published anonymously for the general amusement of the masses. But it is not quite so funny when you wake up after a night of drinking and find that you have sent an illegible and embarrassing text to that kid you worked with in the summer, or that boy who gave you his number once at a party, or your mom. Public service announcements inundate us with the dangers of drunk driving and it is high time a PSA was made about drunken texting.

There are many scenarios in which a person may feel the need to drink and text. Scenario No. 1: You feel the need to text your mom to tell her how drunk you are. Oftentimes, after having a couple of drinks, one may feel obliged to text Mom to say "hi." This is not a good idea. No matter how sober you think you are, Mom is still not going to appreciate the text at 1 a.m. Mothers have intuition. They know when you are drunk. To save the embarrassment and lecture on responsible drinking that is sure to follow, just put the phone down.

Scenario No. 2: You feel the need to send a racy text to the guy you have been seeing, hooking up with or dating. Under the influence of alcohol, people often feel the desire to send texts of a more sexual nature. They should refrain from doing so. It will not come off as cute. If anything, you run the risk of appearing creepy and disrespectful. Depending on the level of intoxication, the text most likely will not make any sense. The T9 entry mode is not kind to drunken texters. This type of drunken text will almost certainly come across as sloppy and will definitely lead to embarrassment the next day when you reread it.

There are many other hypothetical scenarios in which drunken texting is a problem, but they are too numerous to count. The biggest problem with drunken texting is that it is almost unavoidable. One cannot go out without one's phone. Cell phones are necessary when going to clubs, parties or other places where alcohol consumption may occur. People need them in case they get separated from their friends, need to call for a ride or find themselves in an emergency situation. Therefore the simple solution of leaving your phone at home when you go out drinking is not really a possibility.

So how can drunken texting be avoided? A reminder of the dangers of drunken texting should be in place on the screen of the cell phones of all intoxicated individuals. Before leaving for a party, people should put this on their phone. Ideally it would be some sort of sticker, like a warning label on cigarettes. It would read: "WARNING: Drinking and texting will lead to embarrassment, mortification and a possible desire to crawl under a rock and die." This seems to be the only logical way to end the epidemic of drunken texting.