For the benefit of those who will be busy during Super Bowl XLI, The Daily Campus has gone great lengths to help you. We enlisted two of our writers to play the match-up between the Indianapolis Colts and the Chicago Bears the only way they know how - Madden 2007 for PlayStation 2. All rosters were brought up to date, including current injuries for both teams.
Playing the part of Peyton Manning and the Colts was Associate Managing Editor Kevin Meacham, while Rex Grossman and the Bears were played by Associate Sports Editor Pat Parker. Here is a report of what to expect Sunday night:
MIAMI - For years, the knock on Peyton Manning was that he couldn't win the big one. On the other hand, no one ever said he couldn't score 66 straight points. Manning threw for 284 yards and 8 touchdowns as the Indianapolis Colts blitzed the Chicago Bears 80-10 in Super Bowl XLI.
"Man, I can do no wrong," said digital Colts head coach Tony Dungy. "Oh, were you people questioning Tony Dungy when we lost to Jacksonville? Yeah? Well, Tony Dungy would like you to kiss the ring."
Indianapolis played three of the most dominant quarters in the history of football, turning a 14-10 lead into a record-breaking rout. The Bears' fortunes turned when Rex Grossman was knocked out of the game with a torn pectoral muscle with 3:09 left in the second quarter.
From there, Brian Griese led the Bears to the loser's circle in heroic fashion. Griese finished the day 3-for-26 with 11 interceptions and no touchdowns.
"You know, when you turn the ball over, you're not going to score points," said digital commentator John Madden. "And when you don't score points, you're not going to win games."
The targets for Manning were varied - seven Colts caught at least one pass, five catching at least one touchdown. As expected, Marvin Harrison was the star, grabbing 4 balls for 127 yards and 2 scores, including Manning's favorite play of the game.
"I went up to [running back] Joseph [Addai] and said, 'you know what I haven't done in a while?" digital Manning said. "Then I just threw it up to Marvin, because I can. I call him Marvelous."
"…," digital Harrison said.
The lesser-known receivers made their impact too, Aaron Moorhead scored every time he touched the ball, with 3 catches for 43 yards and 3 touchdowns.
Moorehead's first touchdown, coming after Griese's fourth pick, extended the Colts' lead to 31-10 with 49 seconds left in the second quarter. According to Manning, the journeyman receiver caught the attention of the league.
"Moorehead?" digital Manning said. "Is that the guy who CUTS THAT MEAT?"
When Griese's next interception came seconds later, Addai was there to convert it on a six-yard touchdown run, making it 38-10 with three seconds to go.
"At that point, Tony Dungy started getting bored and calling random timeouts," digital Dungy said. "Tony Dungy chalked it up to mind games, but really Tony Dungy can use his timeouts as he pleases. Do you people have a problem with that?"
Addai also scored on a 100-yard kick return in the first quarter, cutting through Chicago defenders to give Indianapolis a 14-3 lead.
In the second half, the Colts hung back in a soft zone, but Griese couldn't take advantage. Nick Harper, on the other hand, found himself in great situations - the safety made three interceptions, including one returned to the end zone, good enough to make him Super Bowl MVP.
"I can't catch a break," digital Manning said. "If Tom Brady threw 8 touchdowns, you'd have given him an MVP and a key to the city. And you'd all probably give your wives to him for a night. God. You're all a bunch of sheep. DE-CAF! DE-CAF!"
Manning then asked a reporter to sign a melon for his little brother who, he assured, was a big fan.
The Bears managed just 96 yards on offense, 87 of them on the ground. Cedric Benson led the Bears with 23 yards on six carries. But it wasn't nearly enough to get the Bears close.
"Frankly, that was like beating a college team," digital Manning said. "And not a good college team, like Tennessee with that handsome 6-foot-5 quarterback with the laser rocket arm."
The Colts expanded their lead to 59-10 after three quarters, exceeding the previous Super Bowl scoring and margin of victory record, set during the San Francisco 49ers' 55-10 victory over the Denver Broncos in Super Bowl XXIV.
They also set the NFL's scoring record on a meaningless 24-yard touchdown pass from Manning to Harrison with 23 seconds remaining, closing the scoring. That broke the all-time NFL scoring record of 73 points, set by the Bears in a 73-0 rout of Washington in the 1940 NFL Championship game.
"Man, isn't that some irony," said digital Bears linebacker Brian Urlacher. "I mean, Alanis Morissette could probably write a song about it if she friggin' knew what irony was. That's a whole other story, though."
"Late in the fourth, Tony Dungy just started calling timeouts," digital Dungy said. "Tony Dungy wanted that record. All that stuff about Tony Dungy and Lovie Smith being best of friends? That's all a front, son."
Chicago had a chance to take a lead early in the second quarter, thanks to a Devin Hester 98-yard kick return, Chicago's only touchdown of the day which cut the lead to 14-10, and a Colts' 3-and-out that followed. But Grossman, who finished 1-for-4 for 29 yards, threw his only interception and Adam Vinatieri's 54-yard field goal gave the Colts a 17-10 lead before the barrage of interceptions began.
"I can honestly say that I'm happy to finally win a championship," digital Vinatieri said. "I thought I was going to be one of those guys who retired without one. And frankly, as a kicker, if I don't have any rings, what am I? A soccer player, that's what. I wouldn't wish that on anyone.
When Dungy was asked how he inspired his team to the historic win, he was deferential.
"Man, Tony Dungy doesn't reveal his secrets," digital Dungy said. "Though be assured that it was the greatest speech in sports history. In fact, I'm sure Harrison will tell you all about it."
"…," digital Harrison said.
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