InstantDaily: 4.12

Let’s see if this still works... Kemba Walker.

If you don’t like music, dancing, wings, or free stuff, stay away from Connecticut Commons this Friday! And go back to Syracuse.

Whatever happened to that awesome toast comic?

Seeing that chain smoking giraffe outside of the student union everyday is making it really hard for me to quit smoking.

That awkward moment when your TA goes from zero to hipster in between your last class and today, and you don’t know how or why it happened.

Apparently the worst thing to say to your ex-girlfriend after sex is, “That’ll do, pig.”

I told my roommate that I’m over the InstantDaily and her response was “I think it’s gone the way of the marshmallow.” ... What does that even mean?!

Evidence that our society’s vocabulary has been deteriorating:

1990: “I like big butts and I cannot lie”

2005: “booty booty booty rockin’ everywhere”

2011: “ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass”

I stole five handfuls of the chocolate eggs they had out in the dining hall for Easter, and just tried one now only to find they’re disgusting. #karma

That awkward moment when you wake up to realize you pooped a little in your sleep.