As you read this, keep in mind that I have sincere respect for The Who. I was taught from a very young age to respect my elders. And believe me, they are very much my elders. But really, they are a great band that has produced great music. They’re just a bit past their prime. I’m happy for them; I’m sure they’ll score some high fives down at the nursing home when they perform at the Super Bowl halftime show. So, just remember that the following is presented with the sweetest and kindest intentions possible.
It’s been an ongoing trend that aging has-beens front the Super Bowl halftime show. Including this Sunday’s, the past six halftime performers have been The Who, Bruce Springsteen and the E-Street Band, Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers, Prince, The Rolling Stones and Paul McCartney. The respective ages of the artist or the band’s lead singer at the time of their performance were 65, 59, 57, 48, 62 and 62. For a league whose players are notorious for being forced into early retirement, the NFL sure books performers who refuse to quit.
This Sunday, anyone born after the mid-1990s will be asking, whooooo are you? Who? Who? Who? Who? And yeah, they’ll really wanna know. Last year as Springsteen was singing “Born to Run,” all I could think was, “Wow Bruce, it’s been quite some time since you were born – would you like a cane or a walker instead?”
Why does the NFL keep scheduling these fossils? Do they have some kind of deal with the AARP? Bring in some new talent. Let us watch some young guns. Why don’t they understand that’s what people want to see? Why do they insist on scheduling these old men? Doesn’t the NFL know that Peter Townshend wants to make it in time for the early- bird special?
I have some legitimate ideas as to why. In all seriousness, the NFL may want to improve the image of its halftime shows after the Janet Jackson and Justin Timberlake debacle six years ago. We all know what happened with that.
After that incident, maybe the NFL wants to play it safe with older musicians that would appeal to a larger, older audience. Except that those older men would undoubtedly prefer seeing another wardrobe malfunction with a young female.
But maybe, just maybe (and this is my favorite reasoning), the NFL wanted to guarantee that – no matter which teams made the Super Bowl – there would be someone in the stadium older than Brett Favre.
Just throw someone new out there. Let us see some Kanye West or Taylor Swift. Just please, let it be someone who was born after Super Bowl I, which was 43 years ago. They don’t even need to be good artists, just someone fresh! They used to schedule popular musicians ... New Kids on the Block performed in Tampa in 1991! Give us some Miley Cyrus for all I care. That’s Miley. Not Billy Ray.
But let’s be realistic. Next year, we’ll probably see Ozzie and Black Sabbath mumbling into the microphone, or maybe we’ll see Madonna singing from her album Erotica. Please no. Oh, please no.
So, during Super Bowl XLIV’s halftime – and every future halftime for that matter – enjoy your history lesson.
See now, wasn’t that respectful?
11 comments
YES. I agree. We need to see some hard rockin' talent. A band that can lay down a phat bass line and a shreddin' guitar solo. Creed, or Nickelback would be great come 2011.